Dear congregation,I promised to give you this testimony after the car accident that happened after this week's end of year conference and revival of blessings.
TESTIMONY 1
While driving away in the Ferrari given to the church by a grateful parishioner, some god-forsaken idiot did not move out of the way when he saw me approachingAnyway, we thank the good Lord for the blessing of airbags and the blessing of church insurance. AMIN OH!
Please look at this picture to see what this idiot did to the official car of the church! (The COGP logo is on the other side). It is no surprise that he was driving such an old model wretched car. Such a clearly evil person will never experience the bountiful blessing of a ferrari.
But ladies and gentlemen, the real testimony is that I came out of the accident without a scratch on my body while the driver of the ugly car broke two ribs. He clearly was not deserving of the miracle of airbags which our good Lord gave to me.
By these evidences shall you know the children of the Lord, from the children of Satan. SAY AMEN!!
TESTIMONY 2
Two weeks ago, while driving on 3rd Mainland Bridge, the car in front of me got attacked by armed robbers. I sharply locked my doors put my gear into reverse and did a u-turn. It was the Angel Gabriel himself that cleared the one-way traffic behind me that day, God knows I cannot remember how I escaped.
As the poor driver was screaming for help, i shouted to him before winding my glass up
"HEAVEN HELPS THOSE WHO HELP THEMSELVES!!" and sped away. I would have liked to add the chapter and verse of the bible for that quote, but alas, the automatic glass of the mercedes was too fast for me.
We thank the Lord that it was not me who was a victim of armed robbery!
A child of God will escape with a testimony to tell, but a child of Satan will suffer the consequences. AMEN!!
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